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They certainly didn't want to repeat that ordeal, so they learned how to avoid affairs in the future by following the extraordinary precautions that I recommend.But serial cheaters don't regard an affair as a mistake.The man who brought me his manuscript would never have signed up on a cheater's website.His goal was to seduce rather than simply to have an affair with a willing partner. For other serial cheaters, however, the challenge is to accumulate partners.But then, a few minutes later, another woman appeared. It didn't take long for the two women to figure it out and as they were arguing with each other, his wife entered the room. His wife learned for the first time that she was married to a serial cheater. I define a serial cheater as a married person who willfully and deliberately has had more than one extramarital romantic relationship.Most of the over 10,000 cases of infidelity that I have witnessed have not involved serial cheating because these unfaithful spouses were not trying to have an affair.But most serial cheaters are not that good at what they do.They try to hook up at bars, shopping centers, and even church with just enough success to keep them going.
But when it was over, most of them saw it as a terrible mistake.For him, it was the challenge that gave him a great sense of accomplishment once the relationship was consummated. Instead of moving on after an affair to a new partner, they add them to the list.One man I counseled had eleven partners at the time he was caught, none knowing about the others.As emotional needs are being met, innocently, the romantic love threshold is eventually breached, and the couple find themselves in love with each other.In some cases, emotional needs like conversation or recreational companionship are not being adequately met in marriage, so a spouse looks to others to meet that need.